Fresh off the Press: Ursula's Hot Shots

Dear Ones,

We do hope from the bottom of our indoors-all-day-today hearts, that you are out there turning brown and amassing nose freckles.  We know from recent updates that Kristy will not be pursuing a career in desert farming.  The nicknames around here are sometimes cute, sometimes charming, sometimes humiliating, but always pretty accurate.  And Kristy we called Kristy Loo Hoo, after Cindy Loo Hoo (remember she was the little person who made the Grinch love Christmeas after all?).  Well our Little Kristy Loo Hoo is so damn cute you just want to bite her cheeks, I swear it.  When she gets here in the morning she is greeted by a loud Dream Team chorus of “Whoo HOooo, Looo HOoooo!”  We never call her Kristy.  We call her our little “Loo Who”, but soon after her first day of work on the Ejido, she referred to herself as Boo Hoo Loo Who, because she said that she doesn’t do well in such heat and that she was failing at everything.  Valerie messaged her to keep her head up. 

The next day Valerie asked what should we say to our Little Loo Who, and I suggested the questions: How much does your life feel like it sucks? and What have you failed at today?  Salsa.  By Thursday, she’d failed at everything including salsa.  She put so many chilis in the salsa that no one, even folks used to the heat, would eat it.  She said every bone and in her body hurt.  She said she was finding new things to fail at that she never even thought about before.  She planted pinto beans. 

I suspect our little Boo Hoo Loo Hoo will have a new harder edge to her sales which might sound something like, “How dare you!  You grow a goddam beet and then ask me to change the price!”  I suspect she’ll have borne an immoveable advocacy for Fairtrade that will start with, “Do you know how early we got up?  Do you know how hot it is?  Do you know howlong the hours are?  Damn right a farmer is worth every penny we can gather.  And there is no reason anyone else should get a portion of those wages.  Certainly not some fat cat in LA.  Certainly not a marketing board.” 

She was going to bring her volleyball knee pads.  She brought a few books.  I bet she’s glad for the pads.  I bet she hasn’t even held up a book….if she even unpacked her books, the furthest those books have come to being read is likely laying open on her chest while our little Loo Hoo tries to read through eyelids that would rather be closed.  

But these are the type of things she’s been yanking outta the ground!  If you get Baja product, chances are they’ve made some contact with Loo Hoo’s tears.  They’re turning our little dream boat into a farmer down there.  Gold bunched beets, the red and Chioggias are just as beautiful. 

Pink chard!  Also from the Baja.  I just wanted to show you what we meant by pink chard.  We meant chard, that’s pink. 

Something Good: Bunched nantes carrots. 

Three guesses what the mystery vegetable is…..

Kidding, I know you know, it’s asparagus.  But I liked that picture of the grass tops so muchthat I couldn’t not send it out to all y’all.  This stuff is super limited, has indeed just started, so if you see it on the list give us a ring a ling to hold it for you.  It’s from Ralph’s inWashington.  AKA Living Rain, the same farm all of our Washington rhubarb comes infrom.

Brussels from Covilli.  These look a bit like they were stuck in the birth canal a little longer than is comfortable, but they’re fresh and squeaky all the same.  And they weren’t ever evenin a birth canal, so just forget I ever said that. 

Strawberries for Mother’s Day anyone?  In case you were on your way to forgetting: Sunday next is Mother’s Day.  And strawberries are really rolling in right now, and I expect will continue for the rest of the summer and fall.  Angel Food cake?  Whipping Cream?  Nothing says “Thanks for pooching me out,” quite like a pound of strawberries does.  Don’t you think?

And pineapple.  I was going to hold this fruit in my arms just to show you how huge it is, but I couldn’t lift it so here it is, in its box.  Each one weights in at about 50 pounds, which is amild exaggeration, but whatever.  They’re huge!  They’re sweet! 

Red bells from where?  Delta?  That’s right, we’re already receiving red bell peppers fromOrigin-O greenhouses.  It’s May.  April showers bring May Hot House bell peppers, just like your Mama used to say.

And TOVs, which stands for Tomatoes On the Vine.  These are the ones with the PLUs.  Which stands for barcode.   

And beefsteaks!  All from BC!

We’ve finally received our load of Fair Trade mangoes, and pictured below are the ataulfos.  Randy turned half of one inside out for me to try and it was soososoosooooosoosososososooooo tasty.  It was PERFECT!  Soooo, since we have enough to do it, call for special pricing if you can take as much as half a pallet at a time. 

This is a photo to get you used to seeing so many ataulfos at once, you know, like when you start buying them from us by the pallet.  Talk to your Dream Team rep and we’ll make you an offer you can’t refuse….

And now for my favourite thing of all this week: Giant Artichokes.  If I were a flower, I would be an artichoke.  All hard and bouldery on the outside, all party!party!party!party! on the inside, and if you cut into it before it’s ready, the choke could kill you.  Okay, I might not be as bad ass as an artichoke.  But I can work on it. 

This woman is scared of the artichoke she is holding in her hand.  This woman has never seen an artichoke so huge.  This woman is frozen and can’t quite figure out what to do next.  This woman is still standing in the veg cooler, just like this.  She hasn’t moved for like, 10 hours. 

That’s it, beauties!  While we wait for it to warm up around here, let’s just be thankful that it’s not as hot here as it is in Mexico.  And let’s have a good laugh at our Little Loo Hoo’s expense.  It’s not that often that you get to have a good chuckle behind someone’s back, ya know?  I can only imagine, our little Canadian Cutie is out there slaving away in temperatures higher than it ever gets around here, ever. 

Get some sun on your face!

Big Love,

Ursula Twiss

truth. transparency. trust. relationships.